I went to self defense and restraint training yesterday. There is not a square inch of me that doesn’t hurt. I spent 8 hours performing a modified martial arts technique. I am too old for that crap!
For the last 3 weeks in a row we’ve had nasty weather, last night was no exception. It was raining so hard last night I couldn’t leave at my normal time (10PM). I was down in my office when the fire alarm went off, no one in the house knew how to turn the damn thing off except me. I sent staff in search of the fire. There wasn’t a fire, but there was a leak in the roof upstairs and the water was pouring out of a light fixture – now THAT is scary. An hour later I was home, safe and sound…..until next week.
The good news is that I survived this year! 😀
Work sucked, but I still have a job. We survived to see the year eand and I’m grateful.
Best to all my family and friends – may we all get better than we deserve 😀
I love my new job and feel totally in my element. I worked in the adult unit a couple of days and for the first time in the adolescent unit yesterday. All the kids are court mandated. There are only 14 instead of 48. We had a great day and I’m taking a book to one of the kids today. He loves Harry Potter and I just happen to have most of them.
The Bastard Jr is going to Albuquerque Friday to help his sister move into her new house.
I’ve got to start writing more. I’ve missed it and it is very therapeutic to get some of my thoughts down in front of me instead of whirling around in my head making me crazy. The absolutely worse idea that tried to keep me stuck in a no win situation was…..’You’re too damn old to start a new job – you’ll never be a success.’ I know that is crap – knew it when I thought it, but there it was to attack me at every turn. Thank God I didn’t have to stay stuck.
Courage is not bravery, but facing the fear and walking through it. Every great thing in my life has been preceded by a wall of fear.
This little phase is most often heard in Alcoholics Anonymous. We learn to take everything one day at a time.
AA did not teach me how to do this….cancer did. When I realized that I might not see the next sun rise, I learned how to live each day to the fullest.
I am so grateful for learning how to do this so many years ago. It has kept me going on my job for the last couple of months. In my 42 years in the work force, I have never experience anything as bazaar as my current job situation. No one knows from one day to the next when they are going to be fired. Five people got the axe in Austin yesterday. The highest officials of the agency are all gone. There has been a take over by people who don’t have a clue what to do with kids. Most work in the adult system.
Each day I go to work…..usually dreading it. I go in, doing my best to give my best. Hoping that something I say or do will make the difference in a kids life. I take everyday as it comes, ask God to direct my thinking and try to stay focused on the kids, not the insanity.
I believe that I have a purpose, and that purpose was God given. When I purpose is completed then I will be gone. I suppose I have somewhat a fatalistic attitude about it, but it is the attitude that gets me through each day.
Tomorrow I will load up kids in the van and take them to play soccer. Maybe for a couple of hours it will be the job it was last summer. Maybe for that short period of time I can forget that everything is changing in not a good way.